Longing
by Gucia
Summary: Just another relatively short AU version of a certain inspiring scene in Childhood. No perverted peeping Tom Robin, of course ; Anything more would be telling!;P


**Disclaimer:**** Not mine. Guess who I'd wish to own, though... or belong to – either way works! (gets all dreamy-eyed) ;P Yeah, I know, stand in line (as if I haven't already reserved a spot!)! ;)**

**Summary:**** Just another relatively short AU version of a certain inspiring scene in Childhood. No perverted peeping Tom Robin, of course ;) Anything more would be telling!;P**

**A/N**

**For the sake of the mood in this fic, I decided to gloss over Marian's mission – let Robin take care of it on his own. At least that way he'll be too busy to interrupt anything ;)**

**I want to warn in advance anyone reading this that: English isn't my first language, I didn't have a beta and I don't have much of a talent for writing. Additionally, this may contain fluff, clichés and other things some people may be averse to... You have been warned, so please, be kind ;)**

**Longing**

"Guy..."

As if of its own accord, Marian's hand reached forward until her fingertips touched Guy's bare, beautifully sculpted chest.

His breath hitched and hunger flared in his eyes, startling Marian with its intensity and breaking her out of her daze. She would have torn her hand away from his burning skin, had she managed to pull her gaze away from his scorching eyes before seeing something even more potent than desire in their blue depths: a desperate longing that was so profound that it took her breath away. Not one of her suitors, Robin included, had ever looked at her the way Guy was looking at her now, and it made her feel powerful even as it held her captive. Locked in his mesmerising gaze, Marian could now discern a myriad of other emotions in the Black Knight's face. She understood the hurt and anger she could see, even if the genuineness and depth of the first took her by surprise – she'd expected her rejection to have hurt his pride more than his feelings. His pain, together with the fearful hope that was almost shyly coming to the fore, left her feeling humbled and touched her to the point that tears stung her eyes. The intensity of the man's reaction to a mere touch was like he'd been starved for such simple human contact... like he'd been deprived of love, she'd once said, and now she knew how right that was. This realisation made her heart ache for him even as she wondered what Guy was seeing in her own eyes that was causing him to drop the barriers he usually had to hide his deepest, truest feelings from the outside world.

Marian didn't protest or move back when Guy took a cautious step forward. Instead, she let her whole palm rest against his chest rather than just her fingertips. Guy's skin, painted a warm golden colour by the light of the fire, was surprisingly soft to the touch – not at all what she would have expected to find beneath the hard, black leather armour he always wore. The man before her, rid of his protective armour and boring into her very soul with his clear blue eyes, was just that – a man, not her enemy and Vasey's henchman.

Sir Guy of Gisborne was also a man who truly loved her. Her breathing became sharper at this realisation and as she inhaled, she recognised the familiar scent she'd come to associate with the dark knight. It was intoxicating: his scent, his closeness, his mesmerising eyes, the feel of his skin against hers... She couldn't remember why she'd come to see him in the first place, nor could she for the life of her recall what they'd been talking about just moments before. Guy lifted his hand and brushed his knuckles over her cheek in a touch so light and gentle, that she might have missed it if she hadn't seen his intent. Marian turned into his touch, her rose-coloured lips parting on a sigh.

It was more than Guy could bear. Still wary and even afraid of her rejection, he gave in to his overwhelming longing and desire and bent down to hesitantly press his lips against hers. Marian sucked in a breath and immediately realised that it was Guy's and not her own, causing her to tremble slightly just as he closed the distance between them. The light touch of his warm lips seemed to be seeking her permission, permission which Marian wouldn't have been able to deny him at this moment. With a moan, she increased the pressure, letting the hand on his chest slide upwards, until it was resting against the side of his neck, allowing her to pull him closer.

The trembling breath of relief Guy released at her acceptance made the kiss all the sweeter for Marian, as she relished the unfamiliar feeling of being loved and wanted so desperately by a man, who not only had every right to hate her, but whom she hadn't thought capable of harbouring such feelings at all. Her own body's hungry response as Guy's lips expertly played over her own, drawing them into a most pleasurable game, frightened Marian. She'd always been stirred by the handsome knight – from the moment she'd first locked her gaze with his fathomless blue eyes, and that inability to control her feelings around him had always made her uncomfortable and a little afraid.

Marian hated not being in control; that's why loving Robin was so much easier: she loved him, but she'd already proved to herself that she could live and manage quite well without him; his departure for the Holy Land had hurt her deeply, but she'd survived. Loving Robin was simple and safe. They'd been engaged and enamoured of each other as children, they were friends, they shared the same goals, they worked well together, but there was no overwhelming passion and desire between them, no desperate need for the other. There was nothing threatening or overwhelming about her feelings or relationship with Robin. It wasn't the true love as known from legends and ballads. Marian was no romantic and she hadn't really believed the tales that told of the great power of true and passionate love: a love that burned and whose flame was impossible to control, a love that could destroy as easily as it could help to build, a love that could cause as much pain as joy, a love that could stand the test of time and forgive all wrong...

_Is that what __**this**__ is? Love? Or is it just lust?_

The latter thought was less threatening, but Marian couldn't deny the swell of her heart as Guy's arms moved around her, pulling her against his bare chest, forcing her to stand on tiptoe. Her own arms were around his shoulders, one hand tangled in his hair while the other was exploring his back, luxuriating in the smoothness of his skin and the feel of strong muscles flexing underneath. In the circle of his powerful arms, pressed against the hard expanse of his chest, feeling his heart as it pounded against her own, with their lips locked in a heated battle, Marian had never felt more alive, safe and happy. The whole world seemed to have disappeared, taking all its problems with it, leaving what felt like a sample of heaven in its wake.

There were no words to describe the fearful joy and hope that had taken over Guy. He'd known for some time that Marian was not like any other woman he'd ever been with, however, the fact that even after that disaster of a wedding – when she'd not only humiliated him by leaving him at the altar, but had hit him hard enough to leave a scar as a permanent reminder of that awful day – even after **that**, he still loved her, surprised even him.

_Now I feel nothing. _

Who was he trying to fool? Marian made him feel more than he had in years, whether it was pain or love. Ever since he'd met her, the barriers he'd erected around himself to shield him from the outside world had been crumbling, albeit slowly, and now he found himself unable to reach that state of numbness he'd become accustomed to. Even after everything that had happened between them, Guy knew Marian was his only hope of finding happiness and redemption in this life and he realised that he was prepared to do everything she asked, give up everything he had, if it meant he could have Marian's love in return.

Holding her now and having her return his embrace with no trace of the hesitation which had always been present in the past, Guy savoured the difference it made. Overcome with desire, but not wanting to scare Marian away, the dark-haired man sought to deepen the kiss. One of his hands travelled up her side and shoulder and he gently wound his fingers in the hair at the back of her head, while his other hand moved to rest against her lower back. He tasted her lips with his tongue and was rewarded with a soft moan. Marian readily granted him entrance into her warm mouth, instinctively moving her own tongue to meet his. It was Guy's turn to groan.

They'd kissed each other before, but for both this felt like their first kiss, which in a way it probably was, because it was the first time they participated with equal passion and enthusiasm.

They were both breathless when they broke apart. The exquisite sensation of his body against hers created a need Marian could never have imagined, and as Guy's mouth trailed a line of fire along her jawline and down her neck, his hot breath bathing her sensitive skin, she felt as if she were melting into him. She could not be close enough to him and the inexplicable ache that had begun to grow deep inside her ever since she'd first laid eyes on him tonight only seemed to be increasing with every passing moment. She pressed even closer against him, ignoring the slight discomfort of his leg armour as it dug into her soft flesh. Already she was missing the taste of his mouth, so she started planting kisses on his cheek and temple, using both hands to brush his hair away, copying Guy as he flicked his tongue against her neck. The dark knight groaned and recaptured her mouth in a kiss even more passionate than the first.

"I love you." Guy whispered hoarsely against her lips when the need for breath finally forced them to break apart, but he made no move to loosen his hold on her. The words seemed to have been torn out of him against his will, they were filled with agonising longing and were almost a desperate plea. His lips brushed against her cheek and moved lower, as if he couldn't get enough of her.

Marian opened her eyes to meet his, but when she touched his cheek to lift his head from where he'd buried it against her neck and shoulder, she caught a flash of pain and sadness in his eyes before he averted his gaze. It took her a moment to understand the reason.

_I love you._

After everything that had happened, after he'd coldly told her that he felt nothing for her, Sir Guy had just said he loved her. _He thinks I'm going to push him away._ His touch and kisses could have been attributed to lust, but not so after his admission. It was clear to Marian that the words were true, not merely something spoken in the heat of passion. Uttering them had cost Guy more than his pride as he closed his eyes and awaited her disgusted rejection. Marian wasn't used to seeing this side of Guy – insecure and vulnerable... entirely human. He was a murderer, he'd committed atrocious acts of cruelty in his service to Vasey, and yet Marian had the power to hurt the proud knight. There was so much more to Sir Guy of Gisborne than what he showed the world, but Marian had deliberately refused to look beyond his cold and indifferent facade, his vanity and ambition, and his loyal service to the Sheriff. Now, however, she knew with certainty that he was capable of compassion and harbouring a depth of feeling as great as his temper was on occasion.

When a person confessed their love for someone, they weren't supposed to expect to get hurt in return. Marian's heart ached for him, because she knew that he must have been hurt deeply before he'd even met her, not just by her and their aborted wedding. Thinking about that day, Marian regretted her decision for the first time. Guy had seemed so genuinely happy and awed, that Marian, in retrospect, found it easy to forgive the triumph written on his face. Before, she hadn't stopped to think how sad it was that he'd apparently never had any family or friends, who could have invited him to a wedding, so that he may have been spared the embarrassment of not knowing the proceedings at his own wedding. It was terrifying how lonely his life must have been, if Vasey was the closest thing to a friend and family that he had.

Previously, she'd believed that Guy had wanted to marry her for her lands, because she was the daughter of the former sheriff, and because she'd once been engaged to Robin, now, however, Marian didn't think those had been his only reasons. Guy loved her and he must have wanted a companion in her, someone who would always be at his side and whom he could trust. _Everyone deserves as much... Can I be all of that for Guy? All of that and more? Can I be his road to redemption? Can I help him be the man I know he is capable of becoming? Can I not only be at his side, till death do us part, but can I love him as he does me? Can I give myself to him? Can I really trust him... and trust __**in**__ him?_

Just because his love had withstood her rejection, it didn't necessarily mean it could survive the betrayal of her being the Night Watchman, did it? There would be no way for her to keep that secret from him, if she decided to be with him... _Would he kill me on our wedding night, when he saw the scar?_ She realised that it was presuming a lot, believing that he would still want to marry her – _love and desire are one thing, but risking humiliation a second time?_ Even so, Marian truly didn't believe that Guy could kill her, even if he was overcome with rage. Surely he wouldn't turn her in to Vasey – he loved her. _He just needs to learn to trust me again... Is this really what I want? What about Robin?_

What **about** Robin? Did they even have any hope for a future together? Robin was an outlaw and Marian was slowly losing faith in his beloved king Richard's return – the king who always came first in his heart, and for whom he'd left her before and would leave her again in a heartbeat, should the king wish it. _I deserve more. I can't spend the rest of my life waiting for something that's not going to happen. I was deluding myself, thinking that everything could be the way it was before he left for the Holy Land... We're not the same people... or at least I'm not that naive little girl anymore._ That was another difference between Robin and Guy – not only did Marian know that, if she let him, she would always be first in Guy's heart, but he also treated her like a woman, not a little girl... and that was who she was now – a woman.

_I love you._

It was impossible to deny the thrill those whispered words had caused Marian – hearing them from Robin had never felt like this, like she was soaring and her very soul had come alive. This feeling, as well as the whole new world of unknown sensations Guy had made her glimpse tonight weren't something she was willing to give up.

Marian's prolonged silence and careful scrutiny confused Guy. Surely by now she should have pushed him away and run from his house, and yet he was still holding her in his arms, her own hand was still pressed against his cheek while the other lay directly over his aching heart.

"Marian...?"

Her name on his lips was part plea, part prayer, and Marian had never heard a more beautiful sound.

"I love you too, Guy." She finally admitted it to herself, as much as to him. Marian had come to him on a mission, but also to gain her freedom and his friendship, but somehow she'd found more than that: she'd found love. Allowing herself a tiny smile, the young woman didn't allow herself anymore doubt as she drew his dark head down, pouring all her new-found feelings into her kiss. Taken aback and unable to believe that he'd really heard the woman he loved utter those precious words, Guy didn't respond at first, but soon the healing balm of love and reassurance gave him the confidence he needed; and suddenly his hands were everywhere, touching her with an exciting arrogance that only served to fuel her desire. Marian welcomed his attentions, doing her best to reciprocate. Much to Guy's pleasure, her passionate nature won against her maidenly modesty and she proved to be a quick learner.

To both of them, every kiss and caress was an unvoiced apology for every wrong, every hurt, every lie that had passed between them, and at the same time, they were an act of complete acceptance and all-encompassing forgiveness. Nothing had ever felt more right, and it was liberating to finally be able to act upon their feelings, not having to stifle them and second-guess themselves.

"God, Marian, how I've dreamed of this. I want you. I've wanted you for so long..." His voice, husky and deep, played upon her senses, and she did not at first comprehend the unvoiced question in his darkening eyes.

"You have me. I am yours, Guy." She assured him with utter conviction.

And she was: heart and soul, with the hungry and eager response of her body making it clear that it already belonged to him as well, even though he had yet to fully claim it.

"Not yet." Guy whispered huskily and his eyes were full of promise as he added: "But you will be." He kissed her again, before Marian broke the kiss, and did what he'd been afraid of all along: she pushed him away. However, she did so very gently, and had Guy resisted more strongly, she would have failed. Before the man could voice his confusion or do anything else, Marian leaned towards his chest, placing a soft kiss over his heart, and then moved to the side, flicking her tongue over his nipple. Guy's gasp of surprise and pleasure brought a wicked smile to her lips and Marian repeated the caress, completely entranced not only by his reaction, but by how the tiny pebble felt against her tongue and lips.

Having come to a decision, Marian circled the nipple one last time and then went down on her knees in front of him and started removing the pieces of armour on his legs. She looked up, meeting his startled, impassioned gaze, and smiled a strange, enticing smile that was both seductive – in an innocent, inexperienced way – and shy at the same time. Her face, which had been flushed already, turned an even darker shade as she blushed. Oh, how he loved this woman! _Marian will never cease to amaze me!_ He reached down to help her free him of his armour, all the while waiting for the moment when he would awaken from this wonderful dream.

"Are you sure?" It cost him all his willpower to ask her this question once the last piece of leg armour was laid on the floor and he was left only in his black braies.

He needn't have feared her reply, because Marian had made up her mind and she was not one to change it so easily. Marian had given him her word once and nothing had come of it, so now that she was willing to admit that she loved Guy, she was prepared to give him something more tangible – something that he could trust, and have no more need to question her sincerity and her motives. For her part, Marian trusted the handsome knight with the gift she was offering – she was certain that the man he truly was underneath his 'Vasey's Master at Arms' persona would prove himself worthy of her faith.

"Yes." With that simple answer, Guy took her hand, helping her to her feet, and led her to his room.

GM

The sun was already up when Marian awoke in a circle of strong, muscular arms that had shown themselves capable of surprising gentleness. Her head was pillowed on Guy's chest and she heard the steady beat of his heart – it was comforting. The night before had been amazing and more wonderful than words could express. Marian felt a hot blush suffuse her cheeks as memories came rushing back. Before her wedding, none of the well-meaning women had told her of the great pleasure that a man's kisses and touch could bring; they'd only told her of the pain that came the first time a man and woman united, and that it was better, but still had to be borne with some difficulty ever after. Marian knew better now. She smiled against Guy's soft, warm skin and couldn't help but kiss the area closest to her lips. She didn't want to wake him by moving too much, after all. Sighing, Marian thought about how everything had changed so swiftly – only last morning she would never have thought she could be here, feeling so comfortable and safe nested in Guy's bed and in his arms. How had she ever denied that this was what she needed and wanted? That _**he**_ was what she needed and wanted?

It felt so good to be free of all the lies and deceptions – after the initial shock, Guy had been wracked with grief and regret over having hurt Marian when he'd injured the Night Watchman, but even before she'd started to explain, he'd shown no indication that he'd even considered turning her in to the Sheriff. He loved her – she'd never been more sure of anything in her life – and, with time, her own love was sure to grow to match the strength of his.

"You're here." Guy whispered.

She hadn't even realised when he'd woken up, so absorbed was she in her own musings. She hadn't noticed that her hand had been tracing patterns over his abdomen, either. Marian raised her head and found Guy looking at her intently and gently running his fingers up the arm she had lying across his abdomen.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Marian asked, confused at the surprise and awe she saw in his eyes. She shifted slightly to better see his face and dropped a soft kiss on his chest as she did so. After last night, where else _could_ she be?

"I thought... Never mind." Guy shook his head and smiled, the truest, happiest smile Marian had ever seen, making him look beautiful to her. Already, she found herself loving him more than she had just moments before, and if he kept flashing her those rare, genuine smiles, her heart was bound to burst. He cupped her cheek with his hand, bringing his own face closer, and kissed her tenderly.

"I could get used to this." Marian sighed happily. And she truly meant it, because she couldn't remember ever feeling more happy and content. True, as she shifted closer to the man beside her she did feel a little sore after last night's activities, but she'd survived through worse pain and it was wholly worth it.

"Will you, then?"

"Will I what?"

"Marry me and spend the rest of our lives like this?"

Marian gasped in surprise. She shouldn't be surprised, after all, hadn't she believed that the Guy she loved was an honourable man who would definitely ask for her hand after they'd lain together? No, what surprised her was the thrill she felt at the promise his words and his eyes held: the promise of eternal love and of being cherished and placed first in his heart and life forever. Guy misinterpreted her surprise and Marian saw the cold mask slip on his face, his eyelashes attempting to hide the pain in his eyes. How could he doubt her answer, after what they had shared? A whole world of hurt and rejection must have forged this man's insecurities, but Marian was determined to spend the rest of her life ridding him of them.

"We will go on an occasional horse ride, won't we? I don't think I could quite give up riding, much as I would enjoy spending the rest of my life in your bed." Marian flushed a bright red as she said the last words, but her teasing had the desired effect and brought that look of joy back to Guy's face, only to be replaced by something darker...

Maybe she could give up riding after all.

**A/N**

**Okay, so I chickened out of writing the actual love scene – I can't help it if it just wouldn't come out the way I wanted it to. I couldn't resist the bare chest and enticing nipples entirely, though;)**


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